I heard a wonderful quote this weekend:

“Inaction is not only the RESULT, but the CAUSE of fear”.

This really resonates with me, as I see this all the time with my clients.  They blame their INACTION on their fear, when really it’s their FEAR that is creating the inaction.

Consider this…

This summer my son Max went off the diving board for the first time.  We tried to get him to jump the previous summer, but no chance!  He was just too scared, and after several attempts, we let it go and made the commitment to do it THIS summer.

So this year we’re out at the pool, and he decides, “This is the day!”.  Great, got the camera and we’re ready to go.

He slowy climbed the ladder.  He inched his way to the end of the board, body crouched over, and hands tightly held against his chest.  I could feel his fear as his body language screamed, “This is terrifying!”.  He stood on the edge of that board for what felt like an eternity.  I started to get impatient, frantically thinking of ways to get him to jump.

Then I stopped.  I paid attention, and realized that the more he stood there – in INACTION – the more fearful he became!  His fear the year before was the CAUSE of his INACTION, but now I was clearly seeing that his INACTION was just causing more FEAR.

This is a big concept for a 6-year-old, but I tried it out on him.  I said, “Hey bud, what are you thinking about?”

He said, “I’m just afraid that when I jump in that I’ll sink down too far.”

So I continued, “Well is that what you were afraid of last year?”  He said no, that last year he was afraid the water would hurt when he jumped in.

So I asked him, “Are you afraid that the water’s going to hurt when you jump in this year?”  He kind of smiled and said “No mom, I jump in the water all the time from the side of the pool.”

I smiled and said, “So you imagined it was going to hurt last year, then when you tried it, you knew it didn’t hurt.”   He said yes.  So I continued, “Well, just know that sinking down too far is also in your imagination.  So rather than focusing on sinking down too far, just keeping saying to yourself “the water feels good, the water feels good.”

He stood there a little longer (again, what seemed like eternity), and then he jumped.

Now, it could have been that his friend Ethan jumped in first and spurred him on.  Max did admit that when he watched Ethan pop right up without sinking, that it encouraged him to jump on his own.

So this made me think…if we stop focusing on what we imagine to be a bad outcome (i.e. sinking down too far), and go with what we know to be true (i.e. the water feels good), and then follow the examples of others who are succeeding (Ethan did it and it all turned out great) then we will be lead to ACTION.

And ACTION eliminates the fear!

Do you think Max was afraid to jump off the board again?  NO, because he eliminated the fear of jumping by actually jumping!

Now, he may choose not to jump off the board because he doesn’t like it, or he’s not in the mood. But do you see how that is a much more empowered choice than choosing from a place of fear?

It is the same with your health.

You choose not to “jump” into healthier habits because you imagine a bad outcome.  Possibly you are afraid that if you choose to eat healthy that it will be too hard to maintain.  Or you’re afraid that if you try that new yoga class you won’t enjoy it.  But just like Max…IT’S ALL IN YOUR IMAGINATION.

The more you stand on the edge of the board focusing on being afraid of something that you don’t even know to be true, you will stay stuck on the edge of the board, watching everyone else jumping and having fun.

Because being healthy is so much FUN!  So rather, focus on what you DO know.  Meditate on the last time you ate a healthy lunch and actually felt leaner!  Recall the last time you went for a walk and felt relaxed and energized.

Do those memories invoke fear?  No, they don’t.  So focus on these thoughts as you are reviewing your new, healthy meal plans, or when you are signing up for that yoga class.

In this place of ACTION, you will eradicate the fear and make decisions based on experience and personal will.

YOU choose, fear does not choose for you.  And then you get to joyfully jump off the board with the other brave people who have successfully chosen HEALTH.

Have a wonderful day!